Did Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt try to adopt a puppy?
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have failed in their latest attempt to add to their rainbow family. The actor-activist couple learned yesterday that the Louisiana SPCA Animal Shelter had denied their request to adopt a three-month-old Labrador retriever puppy.
The shelter’s refusal came as a shock to Brangelina watchers, who assumed that the couple’s celebrity status and clout would be sufficient to allow them to adopt the next dalai lama if they chose. What’s more, the shelter’s website makes the following people-friendly declaration: “Whether you are looking for young or old, high energy or laid-back, we have the perfect pet for your lifestyle.”
So, Brangelina watchers are asking, “What went wrong?”
A shelter employee who did not wish to be identified provided answers to that question.
“Granted, we are in the business of finding good homes for animals, but we don’t just hand them over to every Tom, Dick, and Brad who walks through the door flashing money, a pretty wife, and a megawatt smile.”
According to the shelter employee, the Jolie-Pitts’ adoption request was denied because they had failed to answer several items on the adoption questionnaire satisfactorily.
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“First, they did not meet our six month’s residency requirement. Then under the why-do-you-want-a-pet question, they wrote, ‘As a companion for our children.’ That’s not always a red flag, but two of their children are too young to behave responsibly around puppies, and we got the impression the couple wasn’t through having and adopting chldren yet. Frankly, they came uncomfortably close to matching our ‘collectors’ profile“We were also concerned about the couple’s marital status, as we prefer to place puppies in more traditional intact homes. Their lack of knowledge about the breed didn’t help their cause either. She couldn’t even point to Labrador on a map, then she tried to excuse her failure by saying it was obviously not a country with pressing humanitarian issues.”
The shelter employee was also puzzled by Ms. Jolie’s behavior toward the puppy.
“During a supervised interaction period she held the puppy in her arms the entire time. Mr. Pitt kept asking her to put the puppy in the stroller he had brought with them so he could practice taking it for walks, but she ignored him until she finally told him to shut up. I felt sorry for him. He had the look of a man who’s used to taking orders.”
Neither Mr. Pitt nor Ms. Jolie answered our requests for comments about the shelter worker’s statements.
I suppose it could be true, but I seriously doubt it. Why would they even try to adopt a dog when they spend so much time traveling and away from home?
It has been pointed out to me that this is a satire piece. I would like to point out that I quoted my source and that THEY do not mention that this is a satire. Honestly, it’s pretty obvious
March 13th, 2007 at 7:43 am
This was SATIRE - to be responsible, you need to label it as such. This is a small thing, but much satire makes the round on the net as news, as you have started one, and some of it is damaging to people. This is not responsible of you.
March 13th, 2007 at 7:50 am
I’ve edited to add that it may be a satire but I will point out that I did quote my source (and the entire artice is a quote) - THEY do not say it is a satire and my ESP appears to be broken.
March 13th, 2007 at 3:27 pm
Satire or real, it’s funny as hell!
March 13th, 2007 at 6:49 pm
Of course it’s satire. It’s pretty obvious. “She couldn’t even point to Labrador on a map, then she tried to excuse her failure by saying it was obviously not a country with pressing humanitarian issues.”
And Brad trying to put it in the stroller.
Very funny. Watch there will be many antiJolie freaks citing this as serious Gospel.
March 21st, 2007 at 3:45 am
Oh….you scared me. I hated reading that Angie told Brad to shut up. I pray they stay together and are happy together for the children’s sake if nothing else. I am always reading how they fight all the time.
One doesn’t know what to believe.